Preparing for the Holiday Hustle & Bustle
The holidays can be stressful and overwhelming for any parent, and for foster parents, the stressors can be compounded by needs of the children during the holidays. Some advanced planning can be helpful in making the holidays more manageable and hopefully less overwhelming for both parents and children.
Have realistic expectations:
For many, the holidays can bring big expectations regarding meals, decorations, & gifts as well as family gatherings and social obligations. Plan ahead, while being realistic and selective about what you can do and how you want to celebrate your holidays. Remember it’s ok to say “No”.
Maintain family routines:
As much as possible, maintain a routine for bedtimes, meals, chores, etc. Include the children in a discussion about the family routines during the holiday school break. Discuss extending bedtimes, but still maintain a set time (for example 1 or 2 hours later than normal). Whenever possible, have family meals, and while some flexibility is typical during school breaks, discuss some limits regarding timely chore completion, time limits for ‘screen time’ (TV, computer), etc.
Provide Structure & Supervision:
With the children out of school, it vital to have a plan for supervision and structure. Structure helps create a sense of routine and stability. Together with the children plan some activities during the holidays (can be low or no cost). Suggest board game competitions, holiday crafts, baking, volunteering at homeless or animal shelter, etc. For working parents plan ahead to arrange for needed childcare during the school break, and discuss with the children ahead of time so they know what to expect.
Schedule “Child-free” Time:
In order to be a resource to your children, it is vital for parents to schedule time to ‘re-charge’. Make a date with your partner, spouse, friend, or plan some time alone to just relax. Talk with your Aspiranet Social Worker about supervision options of respite, alternative caregiver or babysitter in order that you can be sure your children are appropriately cared for while you take a much deserved break.
Communicate & Listen:
Remember to take time to talk with and listen to your partner/spouse and your children. Maintaining calm, open communication can help to reduce confusion about holidays plans, etc. and reduce stress and anxiety during a very busy time of year.
